Apparently today/tomorrow, the county will make 3 proposals of what to do with the Astrodome. Whatever. Those ideas are dumb and should be hated. Lets listen to my funny idea.
Evan’s Idea: Burn Down the Astrodome!
Wouldn’t it be cool to burn down the Astrodome? Spoiler Alert: Yes. But there are reasons to burn down the Astrodome. Notably, history. You see, the Astrodome is the 8th Wonder of the World. And what happens to Wonders of the World? Well if there are no earthquakes, we fuckin’ burn ’em.
Statute of Zeus? Burned to the ground.
Temple of Artemis? Herostratus burned that shit.
The Great Library? While not technically one of the 7 World Wonders, it was a Wonder in Civilization, and Caesar knew what to do. Burn it.
Let’s give the Astrodome the farewell an 8th Wonder of the World truly deserves, and Burn Down the Astrodome.
Because when children look back on history and wonder what became of the great structures of the 20th century, what will we say? Will we say that like the glories of Ancient Rome, The Temple in Jerusalem, or so many other amazing buildings of old, we looted it for space and resources? Will we say it went out like a chump? That we were so short sighted as to destroy a marvel of the ages for but a miniscule benefit. Nay! Send the Astrodome out like a champ. Like a real Wonder of the World. And since Houston doesn’t get earthquakes: BURN DOWN THE ASTRODOME!
PS: None of this Reliant Astrodome shit.