Tag Archives: Blowjob

Burn Down Houston Free Press Summerfest!

This past weekend I attended the Free Press Summerfest (Summer Fest? I like Summerfest, as if it is a unique event separate from an event during the summer. It is not a Summer Fest. But a Summerfest. And now the word fest has lost all meaning and it just looks like someone is about to type fester but they didn’t do it. And how would you say that something was more of a fest than something else? It was fester? I guess festier.)

Among the scantily clad people, corn dogs, and laserhands, one event stood among the rest as the utmost best and top thing that could have happened and did happen at Summerfest. My Tweet about Summerfest was listed by 29-95.com as a funny tweet about Summerfest!

Rain means women in see-through clothes. And you can pee yourself and no one can tell! However, I did not pee myself.

Fame, fortune, beautiful women who will constantly belittle me! Its all on the way!

But besides all that it was a great time to just lay in the sun, hang out with friends, and listen to some good music. Kid Sister was thoroughly impressive. The Flaming Lips had laser hands, a human hamster ball, and claims that “anyone can smoke weed without the fear of getting arrested in the festival,” which seemed like a pretty accurate claim to anyone with eyes and a nose. Except that Simon and Garfunkel already did that and better, after singing Homeward Bound in the Concert in Central Park:

“I just want to thank the police department, the fire department, and the parks commissioner, and Ed Koch. And particularly, people that never get recognized for doing good deeds for the city, a group of people people that have donated half of their proceeds of what they’re making tonight. The guys selling loose joints are giving the city half of their income tonight.”

Besides, Girl Talk already did a better job with the Simon and Garfunkel throwback when he sampled Cecelia, which was awesome!

Also, sometimes Houston isn’t too shabby.

Ah Houston. She'll always be our little secret.

PS: We all ate big floppy corndogs and it was a phallic hilarity

Dan is giving a blowjob to a corn dog

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RedState.com’s Joe Biden blowjob freudian fantasy

Sometimes the truth comes out in subtle Freudian slips, revealing authors’ actual thoughts and desires.

"Mouth: Dick" is how man will search for porn on the future Semantic Internet

Anyways, Moe Lane is writing about Joe Biden putting a dick in his mouth, Blumenthal edition. Words are funny.

The actual article is pretty pointless, about how Joe Biden made some joke about not serving in Vietnam, because he didn’t. So I’m going to assume the entire point of the article was to make a blowjob joke in the headline, or to express a desire for such.